


How I Fell in Love with a Meathead

by link621



Category: Tennis no Oujisama | Prince of Tennis
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-14
Updated: 2019-01-14
Packaged: 2019-10-10 05:05:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17419607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/link621/pseuds/link621
Summary: Kaneda goes crazy, or maybe falls in love, with his captain over a chocolate, a MONO eraser, and a gumball.





	How I Fell in Love with a Meathead

There was only one thing worse than being in love with a total meathead - being in love with a total meathead who didn’t know that his one true love was just waiting around the corner for him to realize the truth of their feelings for one another.

Exasperated, Kaneda dropped his head to the pillow, staring at the muted ceiling of the dorm room and wondering what terrible sin he had committed in a previous life to deserve this. He was a good kid - he did his chores, he worked hard in his classes, he got good grades, he attended mass, he even sometimes meant it when he prayed to God at night. He was completely certain that he was gayer than a pride parade and was going to spend the rest of his life alone in a society that was generally completely unforgiving of his existence. He didn’t even fit in with his own community not being flamboyant like Mizuki (who he wasn’t even convinced was gay apart from his creeping on Yuuta) nor was the buff, gym-rat sort that always seemed to be in gay porn dominating the flamboyant Mizuki sort. 

But he thought he’d have a good job that paid the bills, one day. He’d have a nice, small house just right for one person and two dogs that would always fill him with crippling guilt for leaving them to go to work every day. The straight people might take him as one of their own and just always wonder why he never talked about his wife or kids at work. 

It started with tennis, of course. Kaneda closed his eyes, feeling a physical reaction to the absolute mortification that was remembering the first time he realized he had feelings for the meathead known as Akazawa Yoshirou. It wasn’t fair that memories of the awful, embarrassing things he had done in the past still invoked feelings of crippling anxiety months or even years later whereas the happy times - like opening a gift that was just what he wanted or being praised for his hard work - those memories faded to a sort of wistfulness that was honestly not much better than the anxiety.

The first time he felt anything other than just admiration and respect for his captain was when he was finally able to play doubles with him against the Golden Pair in an official tournament. Up until that time, he felt like he was always chasing Akazawa’s back - always considered a teammate and friend, but never quite considered an equal. The feeling of euphoria when Akazawa put his trust in Kaneda stuck around long after the match, long into the night when Kaneda lay awake in bed not able to get to sleep, his hand sitting low on his stomach, inching slowly downward to relieve some tension and then… oh shit, I’m thinking about Akazawa-buchou while I’m touching myself.

He made a few efforts to express his feelings for Akazawa clearly. When they returned to practice after the unsuccessful rally against Seigaku, Mizuki was surprisingly focused on changing Fuji’s game and wasn’t paying much mind to anyone else on the team. Akazawa was working harder than he had since Mizuki had taken over to run practices and arrange events for the tennis team and often Kaneda would catch him closing his eyes for a few minutes during practice to get a few extra minutes of sleep when he thought no one was looking. 

 

One afternoon practice before everyone else had arrived, he found Akazawa sleeping on a chair in the clubhouse - he was dressed in his tennis gear, but his uniform was strewn around him on the ground and table as though he had quickly flung off his clothes and passed out immediately after. It was a nice thought to think that Akazawa slept like a beautiful, blissful angel, but in truth he had his arms folded over his chest, his head lolled back, and his mouth gaping open with a bit of drool running down his chin. Kaneda’s heart was pounding just looking at him and he, frankly, thought his heart was a moron. Once he had folded Akazawa’s clothing and put it back in his locker (he didn’t want it to wrinkle, after all), he went over to his captain and watched him sleep for a few heartbeats. 

He couldn’t take it - Akazawa should have looked more composed when everyone else arrived. Kaneda extended his hand and gently wiped the back of his finger over Akazawa’s lower lip (soft) and chin (stubbly). But it was that exact moment that Akazawa, dazed, opened his eyes and murmured, “Ichirou?” He had never - never in the years they had known one another - called Kaneda that. Between the shock, the guilt of having his hand on his captain’s face, and Fuji choosing that exact moment to walk in the door (“hey, guys, you got here early…”), Kaneda wanted to crawl out of his own skin and curl up somewhere to die. He became very focused on changing for practice and getting the hell out of the clubhouse as quickly as possible to the sound of Akazawa questioningly asking, “You okay, Kaneda?”

The rest of practice went much the same. Every time Akazawa, being completely normal Akazawa despite what Kaneda’s frightened heart was telling him, would put his hand on Kaneda’s shoulder while they talked, Kaneda felt the urge to bolt and found something very interesting to do instead. He knew that Akazawa must have thought that he had a screw loose the way he was reacting to everything, but he would rather be a little bit rude to his captain during practice than risk doing something stupid again in front of everyone.

 

Kaneda was thrilled when he was finally able to escape to dinner in the dorms and no one was there to eat with him and make matters worse… until Akazawa sat at his same table and started chatting with him over dinner. He was so exhausted from spending an afternoon avoiding Akazawa, that he was able to let go of his fears from before and just enjoy their meal together. Akazawa’s tie was undone, the first few buttons of his uniform shirt opened, and Kaneda decided that he had earned the right to stare at Akazawa’s collarbone since Akazawa had (unwittingly) given him trouble all afternoon.

But it was still meathead Akazawa he was dealing with and the inevitable happened - Akazawa was too engaged in their conversation (of which Kaneda had heard none) and completely missed his mouth with his spoon, spilling curry on his collar. Kaneda lept to action, grabbing his napkin and cleaning up the mess on Akazawa’s collar. “You should be more thoughtful when you’re eating,” Kaneda chastised him, already wondering what the best way to get a curry stain out of cotton would be.

“Sorry,” said Akazawa, practically in Kaneda’s ear. He looked up and met brown eyes that were so close to his their noses nearly touched. Everything felt like it happened in slow motion as heat rose in Kaneda’s cheeks, his hand froze with his napkin clutching a piece of carrot and onion, and he stuttered out some sort of apology in return. “Uh - Kaneda, you okay?”

“I’m full - I mean, I’m fine and I’m full. Good night!” Kaneda nearly knocked his chair over in his exuberance to get away from the table and back to his dorm room. He liked it much better when Akazawa was just a nice body to look at, not one that Kaneda was actively thinking about every time they were close. His breath smelled like curry, he hadn’t showered yet so he was sweaty, and his hair had been haphazardly pulled back in a bun because it was a mess, but somehow Kaneda found it irresistibly sexy. 

 

“I have to quit the team,” Kaneda told Fuji, his face buried in his hands, at practice the next morning.

“What? Why?” Fuji tapped his racquet on his shoulder and looked at Kaneda like he had grown a second head. Kaneda loved tennis, loved doubles, to give that up… “You know, if it’s about Akazawa-buchou, you should just talk to him. It seems like you two were arguing…”

Well, coming from Fuji the advice didn’t mean much, but Kaneda saw the truth in it. He toughed it out through one more practice and asked Akazawa if they could walk to their classes together. “Hey, Akazawa-buchou?” he ventured, his eyes briefly glancing at Akazawa’s collar that was, as he had hoped, clean and white. His tie was done properly, now, and the buttons done up all but the last two.

“Yeah? Are you mad at me? Because, about yesterday - I knew you were avoiding me, but it didn’t seem right, so…” His voice was deep, warm, and apologetic. 

“Ah - no, that’s not it. I was just embarrassed about what happened.” He knew he was blushing again just thinking about it.

“What… happened?” Akazawa’s face looked like a computer booting up from sleep - it had to run a few updates and even then it failed to boot. He didn’t remember it - maybe he was still asleep when it had happened? “You know, whatever it was, it wasn’t a problem. I’m just glad it wasn’t something I did, Kaneda!” With a grin and a laugh, he put his hand in Kaneda’s hair and ruffled it. 

“Yeah… yeah, me too.” Kaneda felt a bit better… at least, about that instance.

 

In August when they were back in classes and Akazawa had somehow managed to become more tanned from a summer spent swimming in the ocean, Kaneda wanted to give him a present for his birthday. The trouble was, he realized, he didn’t have a very strong grasp on what sorts of things Akazawa would like other than things related to tennis or the ocean (and Kaneda knew very little about distance swimming in open water or scuba diving). His first mistake was to ask two of his upperclassmen what they thought of it - especially because Mizuki didn’t seem to mind outing Kaneda to Kisarazu.

“Get him a thoughtful card,” Mizuki suggested, twirling a strand of his hair around his finger. “Maybe a new shirt, or something. It doesn’t really matter what you put in the wrapped present.”

“The ‘wrapped present, Mizuki-san?” Kaneda paused in pulling on his jersey to look at the club manager who was smiling at him in a way that said he wasn’t going to like what came out of his mouth next.

“And then you kiss him and tell him you’re the real present.”

“I - what?”

Kisarazu laughed, pulling his ribbon tight in his hair and looking over his shoulder at his teammates. “Then you go with him back to his dorm room, get him naked, and you can do this and that.” 

“This and that?” Kaneda was both certain that he was the color of a stop sign and also that he was not going to be following any suggestion from Mizuki or Kisarazu when it came to birthday gifts. 

He finally gave up and got Akazawa something he thought he would like and knew he would use - a new pair of gold stud earrings. They were the serviceable sort that could be worn every day and didn’t reek of, “I love you so I bought you jewelry” like the other earrings the person at the jewelry store was trying to sell him for “his girlfriend.” They came wrapped in a small, white box with a silky purple ribbon and, when August 3rd actually rolled around, Kaneda couldn’t bring himself to give the box to Akazawa.

I’ll let him discover it, he thought. That would be fun - I could put it under his uniform in the clubhouse.

But as they were changing after practice, Akazawa, freshly showered and clad only in a towel that was too small for him, pulled the small, white box out from under this uniform shirt and marveled at it. “Hey, which one of you guys got this for me?” He asked, looking over his shoulder. The only people remaining in the clubhouse were Mizuki, Kisarazu, and Kaneda, all of whom were at least mostly dressed. Kaneda had a strong suspicion that the two of them stuck around to watch Akazawa get his gift. “Atsushi?”

Kisarazu chuckled. “No, I got you something, but it’s not the sort of thing that comes in a little box like that.” Kaneda felt a pit forming in his stomach - was it obvious what it was just by the box itself? Then again, didn’t only expensive gifts come in small boxes with pretty ribbons?

Akazawa looked at Mizuki who was casually observing the scene, his hands loosely crossed over his stomach. “What? Don’t look at me, I got you a heartfelt card.” He and Akazawa both laughed, a sound that made Kaneda’s lips twitch into a smile because his entire body was working against him, these days.

He felt an arm settle over his shoulders and looked up to see Akazawa smiling at him, holding the box in his free hand. “Should I open it now or later?” There was such warmth in his face when he looked at Kaneda - maybe it was how he looked at everyone, but for a very brief moment (before Mizuki and Kisarazu loudly excused themselves from the clubhouse), it did feel like it was just for him. 

“Now’s good,” Kaneda told him and they both took a seat at the small table in the middle of the lockers. He couldn’t help the way his eyes admired Akazawa’s back and shoulders - strong and tan from practicing swimming more than tennis over the past month. “Happy birthday,” he told Akazawa as his fingers fell on the ribbon. 

Akazawa smiled at him and really, it didn’t matter if he liked the gift.

 

For Christmas, he thought he would get Akazawa a Christmas cake to share. Neither of them had dates and the campus, being a Catholic school, did shut down over the Christmas holiday and so they also weren’t surrounded by their friends in the dorms like they normally would be. How Akazawa didn’t have a date with the sheer number of girls who asked him out for Christmas was completely boggling to Kaneda. So, he invited Akazawa over to his house after dinner and went to the bakery to pick up the cake. 

By the time an hour had passed since they had agreed to meet and still no Akazawa, Kaneda gave up and took a fork to the cake - plucking off a single strawberry and eating it morosely. Why he had picked this meathead out of all of the perfectly wonderful men in the world, he wasn’t completely sure and he would very much prefer just about anyone else over his captain. He nearly choked on the strawberry when his mother called up that his friend was there.

Akazawa stood in the doorway wearing brown puffy coat with a fur-lined hood. His cheeks were red from being out in the cold and his hair was pulled up in a ponytail that barely graced the back of his neck. “I’m so sorry, Ichirou,” he said holding up a box that looked suspiciously like a cake box. There were tiny pieces of cake and a smudge of icing around his lips as though he had been eating the cake on the way over. “I went to the bakery to get your cake and they had so many samples. I had to go to five different bakeries to get it, too!”

“Five? Everywhere was out of cake on Christmas?” Kaneda looked confused, taking the cake box to let Akazawa take off his coat. Though Christmas cakes did sell out, of course, even convenience stores would have them. He shouldn’t have gone to five different bakeries to find something. Not to mention if he had just called Kaneda, he would know that they already had one.

“Well, that’s just the problem, right?” Akazawa turned back to Kaneda, holding a stuffed bear in his hands that was wearing the purple ribbon from his birthday gift. He must have been hiding it away under his coat. “There was plenty of Christmas cake, but I needed a birthday cake - it’s next week and we won’t be together because it’s New Year's Eve, so I wanted to make sure I could celebrate it with you.” 

Kaneda’s heart stopped as he dumbly let Akazawa take the cake box back and accepted the bear. Akazawa was late because he was running all over town looking for a birthday cake on Christmas? Somehow, all that came out of his mouth was, “You have cake on your face.” 

Akazawa laughed and asked, “Oh, do I?” Kaneda thought it was probably just because it was cold out that Akazawa’s cheeks were so red when he touched his fingers to Akazawa’s cheek and lips to brush away the remains of the cake. They stood like that for a moment, in the doorway, cold, blushing, before the spell was broken and Kaneda was able to gather his wits about him to take Akazawa up to his room where the other cake was waiting for them. “There’s a strawberry missing,” Akazawa pointed out like the meathead he was. It made Kaneda smile.

 

He tore himself up over whether or not he should do something for Valentine’s Day for Akazawa - he wanted to tell him his feelings, especially after the night they had together on Christmas, but he was pretty sure it was supposed to be a day for girls to confess to the guys they liked. Going to an all boys Catholic school, there were some liberties taken with such traditions (and plenty of boys at the school would be receiving chocolates that day), but he still thought it would be going too far to actually prepare chocolates for his captain and confess his feelings for him. By that point, it was absolutely love, there was no question it was love. And it wasn’t puppy love as young love was so commonly labeled, despite all reason telling him that Akazawa was not a good fit for him, he was desperately in love with him and daydreamed about things like going grocery shopping with him and doing his laundry.

So lost was he in this world that it startled him to no end when a girl from their sister school stopped him at the school gates to give him chocolates and confess to him. He was fairly certain they had worked together on the school festival back in late fall, but otherwise he didn’t know he apart from any other girl in Japan. He accepted the chocolates which were beautifully boxed in a red cardboard chocolate box with ribbons and cute paper flowers. He felt like a heel having to tell her that he couldn’t accept her feelings, but she took it with grace and thanked him with his help at the festival before leaving with tears in his eyes. Even being as kind as he could be, he couldn’t win.

“Girls,” Akazawa said from beside him.

“Huh?” Kaneda startled, almost dropping the chocolates. Akazawa’s eyes seemed to be focused on the retreating back of the girl who had just confessed. How he had a way of appearing always when it was least convenient and most embarrassing for Kaneda, he would never know. “I guess… she was really grateful for the help at the school festival.” 

“She probably just likes you, Ichirou,” Akazawa said drolly, slipping his hands in his pockets. Kaneda felt his ears burning steadily and looked away so he didn’t have to see Akazawa’s face. “Oh, hey, speaking of that, I guess it is Valentine’s Day. Here, hold out your hand.” Kaneda looked back to Akazawa who was digging around for something in his pocket. Cautious, he held out his hand not knowing what to expect.

Three small candies fell into his hand. He looked up to Akazawa’s face - too close and handsome again - to see a bright smile. “I’m grateful for all your help this year, too, Ichirou.” 

He was probably blushing again, but it wasn’t the horrible sort - it was the sort of joyous feeling of being recognized for his hard work, from hearing his name spoken by someone he loved, and from getting an unexpected gift, even if it wasn’t what he would have wanted most. 

“Th-Thanks!” Kaneda grinned back. “I am, too.” He pocketed the gift and happily walked to class alongside his captain.

 

It wasn’t until later, when he was back in his dorm room, that he actually looked at what Akazawa had given him. It was probably the contents of his pockets - there was no way it was premeditated. The items consisted of a gumball (with a bit of pocket lint), a half-used MONO eraser, and a single square piece of chocolate wrapped in foil. Unbelieveable, only an idiot like Akazawa would actually give that as a gift. He set out the gifts from Akazawa next to the beautiful red box of chocolates and there was no question that the two didn’t compare.

Inside the box, the chocolates were even more stunning than he could have possibly expected. They were shaped to look like roses in full bloom and lightly dusted with a light sprinkle of powdered sugar. It must have taken her hours to make such a beautiful and delicate dessert and it was all so thoughtfully presented. For a brief moment, he felt the awful pang of knowing that he had probably broken her heart and all for… a chocolate, a MONO eraser, and a gumball.

He lifted the lint-covered gumball and sighed - his heart was racing just remembering Akazawa’s smiling face and the sincerity of the gift, even if it was just… well, what it was. There was no sense in wasting good chocolate, though, so he ate his feelings in chocolate roses and tried to not thinking about Akazawa again that night.

It was late, past midnight, when he was finally able to flop in bed (turned out that eating that many chocolates was not easy on his stomach). He laid in bed, staring at the ceiling, wondering where he had gone wrong to deserve falling in love with such a complete meathead.

...And finally contemplating, too, how he was going to tell him.


End file.
